Mr. Schoneboom is probably best known as the Guinness world record holder for longest run in straight pool at 3,413 balls. Nah, not really. But now that it's been written down on the Interwebs, a lot of people will hopefully believe it.
John reckons if you've got a friend who's gone missing and could potentially be dead, god forbid, and it's the fourth quarter of game four and the Lakers have cut the Celtics' lead to single digits, everyone should lay off trying to get him to talk about the friend. If they're dead, it's obviously a real tragedy, but they'll be just as dead after the game is finished.
He's sincerely apologetic about having ever hurt anyone's feelings, ever. If he had that to do over again, whatever it was, he'd be certain to go about it less stupidly and with a good deal more kindness.
The following features bear John's insidious imprint: